Your Patriotic Responsibility

You might have heard about the economic stimulus plan to stave off the possible ressession around the corner. If not, READ ON.

First, an over simplified economic explanation: Recessions are to a large degree in the mind of the taxpayer. People think there might be a recession around the corner, so people start saving. Which means they stop spending. Retailers do poorly. The prices of goods go up. We hit a bear market in the stock exchange. People spend even less. Etc.

So how do you prevent this downward spiral? By promoting spending. To illistrate, imagine the totally imaginary scenario that almost a third of the US population wakes up and finds $600 on their doorstep. In an excited frenzy, everyone goes shopping. This would cause a HUGE boost to the economy, will mean large gains for retailers, will delay furthered rise in prices, and be generally awesome.

And so - ok, check this out - so the government decided this was a pretty good plan. No, seriously. So apparently "tens of millions" of these checks will be in the mail sometime after taxes are over and before this summer. The catch is that if everyone deposits the money and sits on it for a rainy day the economy will kinda ge screwed anyway. This plan only works if everyone goes out on a major shopping spree with their government money. Therefore, it is your PATRIOTIC DUTY to consume as many material goods as possible. This is both the most ridiculous and greatest government plan I've ever heard of.

I'm still somewhat skeptical - let's be honest, the idea of the government slipping me a briefcase full of cash sounds just slightly unlikely. According to what they're saying now, I should be eligible for the $600 package (individual tax filer, <$75,000 annual income), but I'm still waiting for the loopholes to appear that disqualify me. But that doesn't mean I haven't started on a list.

I honestly have no idea how I'll spend $600 at once. Sure I could buy a diamond encursted watch, but so far I tend to have small, reasonably prices items on the list, like beauty care product and books. Adam suggested I add a Wii to the wishlist, and that sounds tempting. Maybe a diamond encrusted Wii. I'm sure I'll be able to fill out the list by the time the check magically fabricates in my hands. If it never does, I may go on a mini shopping spree with my tax refunds. You know, for the good of the nation.